"Everyone talks about a happily ever after, but no one talks about what you do when you see your happily ever after crumbling…At first, you are in denial. Then comes the part where you break down. Then comes the acceptance, & finally, you reach that phase where your life completely revolves around them.
Ours was an arranged marriage. The first time I met her was in 1978…I was shy, but she spoke for the both of us. She was beautiful, smart, full of life. 2 months later, we got married.

Her, ‘You know what happened?’ at night, & her spontaneous, ‘Let’s go on a trip,’ was what I lived for. Once we had kids, they became part of our road trips. But then, one day, everything changed.

In 2010, at a party, when someone had cracked a joke, Kiran pretended to laugh forcefully. I could understand she was out of sync with the conversation. Then she began forgetting small things – like which key would open the door. She would lock herself in the washroom & not know how to get out.

So I took her to multiple doctors. Some said, ‘Alzheimer’s,’ some said, ‘Bipolar Disorder.’ I was confused. She started losing the sense of time. And then…she lost her speech.

Then, in August 2015, we finally got a diagnosis—Fronto-Temporal dementia. We were told, ‘She has 2 years to live.’ But I wasn’t ready to let her go…But when she forgot me, our kids, & our life, I stopped trying to treat her. Instead, I decided to spend whatever time she had left, with her. I took her on walks & gave her flowers. But slowly, she stopped eating & walking. She began having seizures.

During one such seizure in 2022, we admitted her to the hospital. She was covered in tubes. But she hated hospitals. So, we took her home. I still remember that day—we gave her a bucket bath. We even clicked family photos. She smiled till the end.

2 days later, on 9th August 2022, she took her last breath. It was difficult, but I knew she needed to rest. It’s been two years since…I’m trying to understand life without her. But every time, I hear, ‘Mere sona re,’ or go on a road trip or take a walk in the garden, I realize that…Kiran yahi toh hai…hum 44 saal saath mei the. Woh chor ke thodi na jaygi kabhi…”

Featuring: Sunil & Kiran
Photographs by: Manjari Sharma

Written by: Nishita Singhania


This post was originally shared by Humans of Bombay on Linkedin.